Our journey began during the months leading up to Sophia’s arrival, our second daughter. The pregnancy was fraught with challenges. At just 15 weeks, doctors found a fast-growing tumor that they suspected was cancerous. Dr. Mathews had to remove an entire ovary, leaving me with just a portion of the other. This was it, our last chance for another child. The surgery was successful, but that was just the beginning of our worries.

The Miracle of Sophia

We were hit with another wave of anxiety when an ultrasound showed Sophia had one kidney smaller than the other. A triple screen test also indicated a risk for Down’s syndrome. The doctors recommended an amniocentesis, but we decided against it, figuring that the stakes of losing our baby were too high. When Sophia finally arrived, she was perfect in every way. But I couldn’t understand why, after all these trials, life decided to deliver its most crushing blow yet.

Choosing Love Over Logic: The Journey to Sophia

Bringing Sophia into the world wasn’t a simple decision, given my health challenges. Doctors warned against having another child, cautioning that it could exacerbate my condition. But sometimes, the heart’s desires outweigh even the sternest medical advice. We took that leap of faith, and I couldn’t be more grateful for the beautiful blessing that is our second daughter.

Gavin: The Light of Our Lives

Gavin was everything a woman could wish for in a husband—loving, caring, and exceptionally family-oriented. Despite his taxing job as an editor, commuting from Victoria to Nanaimo, he always made us his priority. He had a wicked sense of humor, a cheekiness that was oh-so-British, inherited from his parents. Gavin and I weren’t just partners; we were soulmates. We traveled to remote corners of the earth, embraced each other’s quirky humor, and built a life full of shared dreams. Just a week before his passing, he left a heartfelt note on the kitchen counter, thanking me for making our home feel like Christmas and for all that I do. Gavin had this incredible gift for making you feel indispensable, always taking moments to express just how much fuller and more vibrant his life was because I was a part of it.

The Night That Altered Our World

On that late night, the stormy weather foreshadowed the devastating news that was to come.  I was startled awake at 1 a.m. by pounding on the door. My heart sank as I saw two police officers and a woman. That night, our lives were forever changed. The woman who came to tell us, the one who held Sophia while I grappled with the news, became the Angel of Death in my eyes—her kindness juxtaposing the harsh reality that she brought into our home.  The scream that erupted from me was the way my older daughter found out about her father’s death—a heartbreaking initiation into our new reality.

Keeping Gavin’s Legacy Alive

Despite the gaping hole left behind, we found ways to honor Gavin. An annual community run, attracting hundreds of people, keeps his love for sports and community alive. Over 600 people came to bid him farewell, a testament to the lives he touched.

Time Heals, But Scars Remain

While time has moved us forward, we live with the scars of our loss. My daughters might have missed out on the world’s best dad, but they have a mom who continues to fight, driven by the love and the strength he instilled in us.

Our Journey Continues

As we move along this thing called life, we’ve got our ups and downs. But no matter what, I’m so grateful for my girls. They’re like rays of Gavin’s light, cutting through the cloud of his absence. He was our rock, and even though he’s not here in the flesh, his spirit’s alive and kicking through them. They do stuff every day that makes me think, ‘Wow, Gavin would’ve been so proud.’ So we keep on keepin’ on, bound by a love that’s too strong to break.

This is part of my healing—putting it all into words. If you’re reading this and it hits home, just remember you’re not alone. We’re all walking this bumpy road, but we’re doing it together.

With warmth,

Natalie

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Natalie Fletcher

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